What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

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Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Make Nazis afraid again!

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

Which is the best AI app for house plan making?

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

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Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

How long does it take to see results from drinking whey protein shakes?

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

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Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

At what point does trespassing become self defense? What are the necessary conditions for this line to be crossed from trespassing to self defense?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

What habits do happy couples have?

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

How often should you forgive someone for hurting you? At what point should you cut ties?

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Why do I sweat so much at the gym?

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

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Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

Have you ever forcibly sucked someone’s dick?

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